Month at a Glance

There's been a lot of changes in the last month and not all of them the happy, lighthearted kind.  No.  I got a phone call one day.  The caller I.D. said "Town of B****, WY".  I knew right then that something was wrong.
"Is this Kelly?...there's been an accident."

It's a very weird thing to get a call from a police officer.  I immediately was a co-star in some sad movie, I could almost hear the music, setting the mood for the scene.  The officer kindly told me of my dad's death.  There's no way this is true, this must be wrong, I'll call my mom and she'll tell me it's wrong, he's just in the hospital or something.  Maybe they got the wrong person.  It was not in error that he called me.  I was not misinformed that my Daddy was dead.  I hadn't heard his voice since Mother's Day, when he wished me a happy one.  That was the last time I'd hear his cheer-filled voice.  At least on this side of Heaven.

I traveled to Colorado and the journey there is such, that I had ample time to let the news really sink in.  You know, when you are a mother, or a parent in general, your first priority is your children.  I had a couple days of getting them prepped to be without me for several days.  (As it turns out, I've figured that it takes 9 people to fill my shoes...but that's another blog entry.)  I didn't have time to really injest the news of my dad's passing.  I had too much to do.  Then, on a Thursday morning, I boarded a plane.  It hit me like a mack truck.  He was gone.  His smiling face, his kind eyes, his cheery nose, his gray hair, his flannel wearing torso, his jean-clad legs.  I would never see him on Earth again.  My heart ached terribly and I know the old man next to me on my Delta flight was wondering what on earth was going on with this young'un next to him.  Who wouldn't want the very small snack on a flight?  Not a girl who was the baby of 5 and was always a daddy's girl.  I felt like I was 6 again, sobbing about losing my blankie.

There are so many things I could share about my trip there.  But some of the moments are just too precious, too intimate and personal, to adequately share.  It was an enjoyable time in many ways.  The common denominator of sorrow bonded me to my sisters and mom in a way I didn't know possible.  It was a very special time of rememberance and joy, recalling the many wonderful and fantastic things he did for all of us.  We had a nice service for him and I think he would have been proud, except for the fact that we didn't have a whole spread of food to eat afterward, he would NOT have approved of the lack of beef or side dishes on that table!  But, other than that, he must have been proud to see his 5 girls stand and proclaim their love for him, all with the thread of the goodness of the Lord woven throughout and to see his wife, his companion for soooo many years, wear a smile on her face and garbed with love.  It was precious and I'm so glad and grateful I didn't miss it.

In the last month I've:
taken a trip
said goodbye to my Dad
sent my eldest to kindergarten
sent my 2nd off to k4
been blessed abundantly above what I asked, by both church and family, just to get me to CO.
gone on an interview and received a job offer
given notice at my current job
sold a dog
returned the uniforms for my husband's job that he got fired from
managed the monthly finances on a week's salary
cross-trained throughout Target

Some of these things are happy, but I can't help but label the month of August (and now on into September), as just a sad time.  I'm ready for this month to be over.  I'm ready to enjoy the holidays and start having some fun again.  I love my Daddy even though he's gone and I miss him.  What great hope I have, knowing that I'll see him again.  Can't imagine the thought of him just being GONE.  I've said it before and I'll say it again...don't know how people do it without the Lord.  For all of you who gave money...thank you.  For all your prayers and kindness...thank you.  For all the cards and sweet words...thank you.  For all of you that helped take care of the girls and offered to...thank you.  I don't deserve any of your sweetness, but I'm so glad you knew I needed to be there with my family and gave.